Tuesday, April 22, 2014

earth day

happy earth day!

i got to wear my new t-shirt today.

not only that, i got a free cup of coffee at starbucks for bringing my own mug. but i still think their coffee is over rated and will never buy a cup although a few years ago someone gave me a starbucks gift card which i used to buy some half priced holiday coffee beans.

i love you sons of bitches.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

a battle of attrition.

anyone getting tired of my whining about the cracker factory? i'm tired of me whining about the cracker factory but i don't have a lot of other shit to whine about so i'll drone on until jesus gives me a sign. i'm not going to hold my breath waiting for jesus to shit or get off the pot.

today i was called into the big office and the h.r. manager was there. when the h.r. manager is present, you're fucked. plain and simple, you're fucked. remember the old george carlin bit? all right billy we're gonna fuck ya, but we're gonna fuck ya slow.

on a more pleasant note, donald is growing like a weed. but as they say, one man's weed is another man's flower.

if you think that's nice, this is even nicer! my favorite turtle jockey, the magic gnome, has taken up residence in a nice little spot in our front yard and is there to greet me and the roo every morning when we go on our walk.

on a more somber note, the son of a policeman WENT ON A MURDER SPREE with a knife. the prick killed 5 people before running away and suffering a dog bite from a 4 legged cop. that's what happens in a country with gun control, you get knifed. he did the dirty deed at a party full of university students. you'd think there would be a few guys there capable of knocking the shit out him before he could take off.

anyone remember this old classic?

i love you sons of bitches.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

donald lives!!!

last year around this time i was droning on about my plant donald and challenged the international readership to guess what sort of plant donald would turn into upon reaching maturity, IN CASE YOU FORGOT.

when we moved a few weeks back i dug donald up and brought him with me much to the chagrin of the lovely mrs myshkin, she still calls him a weed. well, donald has sprung to life! he was a little wilted when i planted him but in the last week it's as if jesus himself tossed a little holy water on the little guy. behold:

it looks like donald will be an early bloomer this year so get your guesses in quick.

things are looking pretty bleak at the cracker factory but as i like to say, who gives a shit. i'm praying my brains out that things are going to go like this tomorrow when my times come to meet with the queen of mean:

i love you sons of bitches