i now know how gilligan felt.
i had the pleasure of attending a wedding yesterday. it was more than i bargained for.
i'm not really fond of weddings at the best of times but this was over the top.
11:00 am arrive at the church
11:30 wedding ceremony (catholic, lots of glory given to the lord)
12:15 take photos ad infinitum on church steps. there were people from several continents and every geographical group and family group and group of friends had photos taken. then mix and match photos to be taken. it was roasting hot in the sun and i was wearing a suit and uncomfortable shoes. woe was feckin me.
14:00 dim sum
16:00 tea ceremony
18:00 reception begins.
everyone eats like a pig, literally! the first course was a whole fecking pig and it never seemed to end. there were 10 courses. i had the biggest bowl of shark fin soup i've ever seen. (sorry rocky)
tons of food i didn't like. i ate very little of most dishes. the servers looked a little ticked with me for not eating the stuff and gave me the crappy part of the fish, crustacean or sea plant. i didn't care because didn't eat most of it. the problem was when cake was served at the end. i got a totally shitty piece of cake.
i told the waiter that i didn't mind a crappy plate of seafood but i wanted a good piece of cake. he smiled, but the prick didn't bring me a new piece of cake. guess what i spent the rest of the evening carping about.
23:30 the end. i had a real headache by the time it was over. tons of noise and stuff i wasn't interested in, not to mention having my picture taken about 1000 feckin times.
24:00 arrive home. shower and sit outside with ruby. fire up a relaxing pipeful and thank fuck it was over.
me and the fast food princess did our family duty for the lovely mrs myshkin, she owes me one after this.
so i got than going for me too.
1 hour ago
20 comments:
The only thing I enjoy about weddings or funerals is the dancing.
Weddings make me nauseous.
You done good. It's also good to be the one holding the marker.
dim sum, pig, shark fin soup..did you have the wedding at the fucking united nations?..
yup...she owes you big time...do you think you'll ever live long enough to reap the benefits of it?
i almost had a nervous breakdown feeding the fecking turtles..we need that lady from dallas to come feed them...
The Dallas Turtle Lady?
sling - i kinda like the going home part.
ananda - thanks, i don't know if i want to cash in my marker or not.
yellowdog - too bad the dallas turtle lady's married, she has my heart.
dmarks - the dallas turtle lady rocks! she has about 120 turtles.
she's a bit of a racist though, she discriminates against water turtles.
I found out by accident that you can drag your turtles around by the mouse. But don't worry, I was extra nice to them.
I've never been to any internationally flavored weddings, just the usual roast beef/chicken and rigatoni. Those wedding were pretty decent, this one sounded like an episode of Bizarre Foods.
Wow you are one brave man for even letting food like that in front of you..the smell makes me sick.
I fed your turtles..it is addicting..you think one isnt getting enough food so you feed that one and then another is starving..jeesh.
My comments: 1st of all - I don't think the Lord was getting anything / 2nd of all - dimsum can be quite tasty / 3rd of all -when you have a headache drink lots of water / 4th of all - she does owe you - cash in soon before the ledger tips in her favor
ananda - i wonder what else those turtles can do?
crazy - the dim sum was fine. i have dim sum a few times a month. it's the genuine chinese cuisine that kills me.
yeah billy that did sound pretty groady.
Did it really last more than 12 hours? My God, that would have killed me.
Hey... you can zoom in on them too!
The lovely Mrs. does owe you one because that is freakin' long ass day to be at a wedding especially if you don't want to be there. I think there are actual marriages that didn't last as long as that wedding. Well way to be a good sport and make sure you get the Mrs. to do something good for you.
What makes a piece of cake shitty? Did you get stuck with one of those giant sugar-turd flowers?
I've never officiated at a wedding in a church, fuck churches.
Those turtles don't look big enough to eat yet, keep feeding them. Turtle stew, yum, yum.
bbc - i hate to say it, but i've missed you.
Wish I could have been there...@ 2400.
i just happened to think..if that wedding had been in texas and lasted 12 hours, they would have been divorced by the end of the night...hahahahah
WTF!!??? ARGHHHHHHHH!!
the only thing that saves you is that you used 'ad infinitum' in a sentence.
You're so hot. ;-)
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