Sunday, November 29, 2009

help

i rarely check comments on old posts. one post in particular has garnered a large number of comments that might be interesting but i have no idea what they say or even what language they are in.

take a look at the comment stream on this post.

HELP ME TRANSLATE

can anyone translate this stuff?

who knows, it might be that nubile young gymnast i've been dreaming of.

Friday, November 27, 2009

dubai.......

today is buy nothing day. second only to the great turtle race in my yearly calendar of interesting events. i'm guessing that most people bought something today, myself included. i found a cool new pawn shop and they had some 24k shiny stuff that caught my eye.

i'll bet the royal family of dubai wishes they had observed buy nothing day. in fact i'll bet they wish they had bought nothing for the past several years!


DUBAI BE BROKE

dubai world has been the symbol of decadence for years. between building the world's tallest building, indoor ski slopes in the desert and the 3 largest man made islands in the world they have been on an spending spree that would make michael jackson look like a pauper.

what do i think about the royal family of dubai going broke??



sadly, the dubai royals won't miss a
beat in their gluttonous lifestyle but the imported workforce might miss a few paydays.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

dexter

that fucking michael c hall!

i've been watching dexter for a while and have a huge crush on his sister deborah. i just love the way she talks. no shit, i love her.



while checking out a few episodes today i read that dexter married deborah in real life. fuck!

i was hoping to marry her.

Friday, November 20, 2009

guess the spot

so china is holding trillions of dollars in foreign debt and western countries owe china trillions of dollars in loans. you might think that the people of china would be prospering and the population of western countries would be suffering. guess again.

the good citizens of the western countries bitch and moan if the government doesn't provide them with care from cradle to grave and don't give a shit if their lifestyles are being subsidized by the suffering of cheap labor in china and other exploited countries.

the question is; when will the balloon burst and westerners have to live within their means?



















i think a lot of people are going to die before the balloon bursts.

Monday, November 16, 2009

canadian border guards

a few years ago canadian border guards were given guns in response to their union bitching and complaining that they needed guns for safety reasons. i think the main reason behind it might have been the extra pay they got for being armed.

it took a few years but a border guard finally used his gun.

guess what our top notch crack shot border guard shot.

CANADIAN BORDER GUARD FIRES WEAPON!!



the spirit of john candy lives!!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

buy nothing day!!!

it's that time of year again, time to buy nothing.

NOVEMBER 27, BUY NOTHING!!!



BUY NOTHING DAY

you might even want to subscribe to adbuster's magazine and become a culture jammer!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

in treatment

i've been watching in treatment the past few weeks and feeling sorry for poor old dr paul weston as he tries to deal with his adulterous slut of a wife. she just won't give old paul a break and lord knows he deserves a little kindness for dealing with mental defectives all day.



i knew that i'd seen this woman before but just couldn't put a name to the face. i knew there was evil in her heart and poor old paul was fighting an uphill battle. then jesus whispered two words in my ear, admiral cain!



holy christ, someone ought to tell dr paul just whom he's dealing with. the good admiral was the toughest bitch in the colonial fleet.

i wouldn't trade places with dr paul for all the kopeks in russia.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

armistice day

i have to be fast because i have 10 minutes before i have to shut up and remember the dead of ww1. it seems the war to end all wars didn't really teach us any lessons. i guess our human brains are hard wired for violence.



time to observe a few moments of silence.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

the goat

when sonny came back from the yukon he was sporting a goatee. his mother and grandparents didn't like it. that was enough for me, i decided to grow a goatee myself. somewhere along the line sonny decided to get rid of the goatee leaving me as the only fool with a goatee. on the one hand i want to get rid of it or quit shaving all together and let the grey hair have it's way with my face. i decided to take a photo, maybe that would help me make the big decision.

after looking at the photo i had an epiphany!



my eyes aren't bloodshot!

holy christ, another benefit of beating alcohol.

so i got that going for me too, which is nice.

Friday, November 6, 2009

flu shot insanity

several weeks ago most people weren't worrying about flu shots too much. people were content to wait until the shots were available, lots of people didn't plan on getting the shot. then something happened.

it was announced that there were temporary shortages because the vaccine was being delayed a week or two. then all of a sudden everyone wanted a shot and they wanted it now. there were priority lists drawn up whereby those in high risk categories were placed at the top of the list. suddenly there were huge lineups at the clinics, people were arriving at 2:00 AM to get the shots and there were accusations of queue jumping. i called my doctor and was told to drop by and get the shot.

a few days ago it was announced that the calgary flames hockey team got flu shots. all hell broke loose. people were furious that the hockey players got flu shots.

FLU SHOT INSANITY

big feckin deal!

in my opinion it was no big deal that these guys got the shots.

these guys makes millions and pay millions in taxes. compare that with drug addicts that pay no taxes and are a huge drain on the system. these drug addicts are on the priority list for shots and people are fine with that. maybe i'm a heartless prick but i think people paying millions in taxes and generating millions in economic activity deserve more consideration than some feckin drug addicts or habitual welfare recipients.

in the past i did a few posts advocating sterilizing welfare recipients after a certain amount of time. it was not a popular idea. so it goes.

i wonder how russia is dispensing flu shots?



i love these russian sons of bitches.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

canadian retaliates against vatican stand on halloween

a vigilant civic minded canadian took action on vatican stance on halloween.

Canadian wipes arse with bible

wasn't that worth the read???

on a different note, old billy pilgrim rides again.

i rode the red rocket to the liquor store to cash in the maximum daily limit of 48 beer tins. when i put them in the cardboard flats i discovered that i had 49 tins. i sheepishly asked the lady if she would accept 49 tins. she took the cans, smiled and gave me $5.00! a 10 cent bonus. i thanked her profusely and rode away.

why did she smile and treat me so nicely?

i cashed in beer tins while wearing a woman's sweatshirt. in slaughterhouse 5 billy pilgrim wore a woman's coat, today i was wearing a woman's sweatshirt and got a 10 cent bonus.

i was dressed like a bum and she tossed me a dime.

so i got that going for me too, which is nice!


Sunday, November 1, 2009

vatican is nuts

is the pope a master of misdirection or just a grouchy old prick?

the vatican has come out against halloween!

POPE KILLS HALLOWEEN!!!

this is reason #279 that i'm happy not to be a catholic. i can't recall most of the first 278 reasons but i'm sure they were well thought out and very insightful.

if i was a less mature person i might drag up all the nasty things priests have done to children but as an enlightened child of the universe i won't mention the darker side of priests.

if my kids were still young and i was still drinking i just might dress them up as a pope and a cardinal.

have you got your half price candy yet?