rosewater.....

the rosewater foundation just keeps growing. a package arrived at my doorstep with a fresh supply of rosewater foundation supplies. sonny noticed how much dear old dad was smitten with his original trinkets so he ordered me some more stuff. it was a pleasant surprise.









i generally hate bumper stickers and would never consider putting one on the mighty sonata but i'm giving the volunteer fire department sticker serious thought. i took the welcome to earth banner to the cracker factory but haven't decided where to hang it. i'm pretty sure i'll be asked to take it down but what the fuck, i might as well have a little fun and annoy my boss.

on a different note, i have a new favorite show. john from cincinnati. i was reading david milch's list of projects and decided to give it a try and was very pleasantly surprised. it has a lot of deadwood actors in it and is very quirky. i heartily recommend it. a 5 star series in my book. too bad it got cancelled after one season.



i love you sons of bitches.

slicks

i invested $50 in a set of slick tires for the iron maiden and finally got around to intstalling them. changing tires on a bike can be a pain in the arse so decided to take a few pictures to show sonny that i can actually do a few things myself.



these little clips are the secret to the whole operation. in the past i used screwdrivers or spoons to pry the tire out. these little beauties hook around the spoke to keep it in place while moving on to a different spot.






and here's the real secret to the whole operation, latex gloves. the chain can be real greasy and i don't like greasy fingers so latex gloves are a must.



after putting them on i took a test ride and everything was right with the world. it seemed like i could go faster with less effort from my tired old legs. the next day i gave them the real test. i went to the top of a hill in our local cemetery and started coasting down the winding roads. this is something i do often just for the hell of it challenging myself not to use the brakes going around the corners. i always keep track of how far i end up coasting along the lower road that actually is a bit of an incline. the new tires took me about the exact same distance and the old knobby mountain bike tires. fuck me!

it would appear that i fell victim to the hawthorne effect when i first tried the new tires. the fact that the tires were new and different made me sense that they were faster. so it goes.



i love you sons of bitches.

the big depression

there's been much discussion as to whether or not we are in a depression. i suppose it depends on your individual circumstances as to whether or not you think we are in a depression. people say that it's not as bad as the 30's where there were lineups for for hand outs. this article, MODERN DAY DEPRESSION, makes an interesting point. in our current state of affairs most handouts from the government are electronic funds transfers or cheques in the mail.

the thing about the article that really caught my eye was the level of income the average household receives from the government:



one of my pet peeves are the totally misleading deficit charts that obumble supporters continually post fraudulently showing that obumble has increased the deficit much less than previous presidents. they usually show percentage increases in the debt under each president. they don't bother to mention that the base obumble started with is much much higher but the incredibly misleading thing is most show about 2 years of obumble debt compared to 8 years of previous presidents.

the above chart shows the increase in wealth redistribution under obumble in no uncertain terms. once the tap is turned on for recipients of government largess it is incredibly difficult to turn off.

is the economic situation going to get worse before it gets better?

who the fuck knows. anyone pretending to know is full of shit.

maybe being white isn't such a bad thing after all:




have i ever mentioned i love you sons of bitches?

i can help

i couldn't help but notice that many people i come into contact with are struggling to get by in this tough economy, both financially and spiritually. as i've become older and more compassionate the level of suffering has really started to bother me. it got so bad that even montana couldn't distract me from these woes and she has the tools to distract me from most anything.

i decided to call my dear friend eliot and offer my help. as usual he was very compassionate to my problems and suggested that i open a branch office of his foundation in vancouver. it sounded like a good idea and i jumped at the chance.

if you need help, give me a call. (but don't call me on the red telephone)

behold the tools of my new endeavor:

i like to give my client a cup of tea to soothe their nerves.



i keep a meager data base on my clients so i needed mouse pads.


i'd be lost without post-it notes.



i like to give my clients a pen.



and of course i needed business cards.



it's always nice to have a eco friendly bag to carry your stuff in.



a rubber stamp can always come in handy.



and kids always like a t-shirt




if you need spiritual guidance or just a shoulder to cry on, i'm here for you and dont forget, i love you sons of bitches.

(the lovely mrs myshkin wasn't impressed when my stuff arrived but the kids are proud as punch of their old dad)

the great turtle adventure,

the hunt for the elusive snakehead fish is over and the chinese DEVIL FISH IS DEADER THAN A DOORNAIL.

friday morning i rode my bike to the supermarket and bought a few bags of groceries then headed to the park to check out the hunt for the snakehead fish and the genocide of about 20 peace loving turtles. there were lots of government employees at the park getting ready for the big moment and a few people concerned about the turtles and koi. there were also about 30 spectators. i think there were 2 turtle rescue groups there but they weren't getting much cooperation from the deadly reptile hunters.

i rode my bike over the staging area and went down the hill behind the yellow protective tape and parked myself at water's edge. a few minutes later a female parks board employee came and asked me to move. i asked her for identification and under what law was i required to move. she very nicely asked me to move again and i said no. a few minutes later a male parks board employee came over and asked me to move. again i asked for identification and what law i was breaking. he was very nice but i refused to move. i told him that i would move if the official conservation officer came over and had a chat with me. the conservation officer came over and the son of a bitch had a gun. he was polite and again i asked for identification and under what law was i required to move from a public park. he gave me a nasty look and told me to move at which point i took out my camera and took a few pictures of his gun. this did not make him any friendlier.

he left and came back with his boss. the boss was a young guy and after a few minutes i asked to be arrested. he was surprised and asked me why. i told him it would be an honor to BE arrested for trying to save a few turtles. he said i was not going to get arrested unless i did something real stupid like jump in the water and endanger the guys looking for the snakehead. if it had been a hot sunny day i might have jumped in the water but it was cold and wet plus i had 2 bags of groceries hanging from my handlebars. he told me that there were ongoing discussions about saving the turtles and again asked me to leave. then it started to rain. the rain got very heavy and i decided to leave.

what disappointed me the most was the other turtle advocates didn't come to my aid or join me in my little protest. i guess most turtle lovers are peaceful and have too much respect for authority. as i rode away i yelled "five bucks on the fish" as if to say the frankenfish was smarter than the government stooges.

here's the dork with the gun:



and here's the fish and turtle catchers:







there are a lot more details to my little adventure but i don't anyone is interested enough to read anymore on this subject.

i love you sons of bitches.

genocide

an atrocity of biblical proportions is set to take place tomorrow.

the gentle and noble turtles of central park are slated to be MURDERED IN COLD BLOOD!

that's right, the turtles are going to be killed!

here's the key sentence in the above story if you can't be bothered reading the whole thing:

The pond's red-eared slider turtles will also be removed and euthanized by a veterinarian

the turtles and koi are being removed and killed because some useless underworked and overpaid civil servants decided that they are an invasive species that are "outcompeting" the species that are native to the lake. here's the insanity to the whole thing, IT'S A FUCKING MAN MADE LAKE! it's like telling someone who builds a pond in their back yard that they can only put in creatures that have been certified by some asshole civil servant.

i plan on going to the park tomorrow and making a major nuisance of myself. shit, i might even get arrested.



i love you sons of bitches.

frankenfish

it seems our little slice of heaven has been INVADED BY FRANKENFISH!

this is the park i ride my bike through most days and have been doing so for about 50 years. about 15 years ago i released a turtle into the lake where the frankenfish was spotted. when i released "jack" into the lake i was always worried that some chinaman would catch him and eat him. when i rode through the park this morning there were floating nets blocking off the inflow and outflow of water into and out of the lake. the fools are penning the fish into the area where the turtle spend countless idyllic hours basking away. maybe they should bring some of those swamp people from tv or billy the exterminator if they can afford his rates.

speaking of frankenfish, my little frankenbride will be returning from asia in a few days. i think she's in thailand at the moment. lucky thailand. i've always said that i couldn't live alone but these past 6 weeks have been bliss, i'm happy as a clam having the house to myself. i might just pull up stakes and move to the island when i retire. the thought of living in a trailer beside the ocean has always appealed to me. i'm a jim rockford wannabe.

on a different note, i picked up "the lost notebooks of hank williams." i picked it up because bob dylan put it together but fell in love with it because norah jones lends her beauty and brilliance to the project.



i love you sons of bitches.