my very good friend leonard myshkin is giving facebook a try. he's been on it for about a week and just can't figure it out. he's ran into a few old friends which is nice but there has to be something missing or maybe my good buddy leonard is just plain old retarded.
leonard's first reaction was, "how is the hell is thing worth 50 billion bucks?" there just doesn't seem to be a lot of meat on the bones. then he noticed all the ads on the side, much more intrusive than hotmail. one of the big deals seems to be that people make quick little comments or cut and paste some crap then all their friends take a quick gander and rather than taking the time for a witty reply they can click on "like". then the light went on in leonard's little brain. the facebook boys monitor everything the rubes do on their cash machine and build data bases on all the members. how convenient to have a record of all the stuff people like. it makes targeting ads all the more profitable.
the other thing good old leonard noticed was that when reading newspapers on-line somehow the facebook deal followed him and he was all set up to make comments on articles even though he hadn't registered with the paper. facebook is monitoring all leonard's travels in cyber space. how fucking nice. another group of dickheads monitoring us.
in any case, old leonard myshkin could always use a few friends if you're so inclined.
did she mention leonard's name?
i love you sons of bitches. (so does leonard)
21 comments:
I was told I should have a FB page to promote my business. My wife set it up and I do nothing with it... I have 200-something friends now.
My wife loves it, keeps track of the kids, photos, found her old high school friends. But I still can't figure it all out.
I'm surprised that Facebook knows what you're doing when you've signed out. Maybe Leonard forgot to sign out when he started browsing the newspapers?
Tracking software is a deceptive practice. They should have a Facebook page for that, and a dedicated 'hate it' button throughout the network.
I have an idea. Let's start a new online business called Footbook and kick anyone offline who comes to join us!
Footbook: "The Anti-Social Network!
Do you think we could make 1/2 of 1percent of $50 billion? I'd be happy to share any of it with you, I'm not greedy.
Blogging might be getting out of date like an 8-track tape but I think I'll stick with it, no Twitter or Facebook for me. I hope it works out good for Leonard though.
I've been on FB for a year or two. Near as I can tell, you're right.
I'd like to have a "hate button"!
I like the one liners, but all the folk who want me to play their games on there kind of drive me bats! I don't have a lot of time for games.
But I do like the contact with my friends,and kids. I have a friend who is a writer and I enjoy keeping up on his stuff. Mostly, I don't do much there aside from poke Shife. :D
robert - that makes two of us. my son loves it and my daughter says it's for losers and stalkers.
gb - thanks of the tip but i've heard that real men don't sign out.
static - i love the "hate it" idea.
shaw - footbook! i like it.
tex - yup, blogging looks better but i think fb gives quicker gratification and that's what it's all about in 2011.
ananda - how about a "fuck it" button?
Facefuck is for little groups of friends that like kicking around together in that fashion, hoping to collect more friends like themselves, family's like it also.
I have no use for Facefuck, and neither do the turtles, or my neighbors out in the boondocks, the chipmunks.
And none of my local friends use it either, if we fucking want to communicate with each other we do it with emails or in person.
Bottom line.... Fuck Facefuck.
I'm surprised that Facebook knows what you're doing when you've signed out. Maybe Leonard forgot to sign out when he started browsing the newspapers?
Don't matter if you sign out, the cookie on your computer will still follow you around. Google and others do the same thing, mention that you're thinking about buying a new riding lawnmower and you'll see lawnmower ads pop up as you surf.
Ain't no fucking ads on my blogs.
Sadly, if you mention whores, no ads about whores show up. Sigh.
gosh billy, quit beating around the bush and tell us how you really feel about facebook.
I go to FB to check up on my daughter-in-law, who records her life on it.
She's been oddly silent for the last few days and I'm already texting my son to find out what's wrong.
I wish FB would notice that I tend to LIKE all the progressive postings and shoot me something in the ad column besides "Lose 30 lbs. monthly" ads. A)If I followed their advice, I'd be hospitalized for anorexia and B)I feel like FB doesn't take me...ME!...seriously. Pout.
That's Fartbook for ya. They love connecting you with this, that and the other on the Internet to invade your privacy and to attack your pocketbook. I use them for a little blog promoting and silly messages to friends and fellow bloggers every once in awhile but that's about it. Other than that, they can go Ride A Flagpole.
I like Facebook ok but I also understand that it is evil at its core-- like anything that exists solely to exploit the uninformed.
nance - facebook seems to think i'm in the market for a russian wife.
kelly - fartbook, i like it!
bob - the more i look at it the more i see it a as money making machine.
Facebook BLOWS. I was on it for a month under an alias just to screw with people, then I canceled.
Now I get JUNKMAIL addressed to the bullshit alias I used.
THANKS, FACEBOOK !!!
I have a love-hate relationship with FB. I enjoy being a voyeur, and occasionally will throw a rant on there but for the most part I just like to see what is going on in my social circle. Good luck to the Canucks tonight. Game #1 was awesome.
heff - i think a few of the facebook people might have read this little epistle and are now shunning me. so it goes.
mr shife - i never thought the canucks would win the cup in my lifetime. my fingers are crossed.
Big Brother is everywhere! But I try my best not to think about it. Denial is bliss. ;)
I love Facebook, but I'm learning not to like a motherfucking thing..them folks know what size drawers I wear.
I used to love Facebook but I cannot be bothered with it now its a bit boring.
Post a Comment