in 3 more days i will open the jar of toonies (2 dollar coins) and find out how many trips i took to the supermarket on the iron maiden. i've been staring at the jar for weeks and have resisted temptation. i'm dying to know how many coins are in the jar but therein lies the problem. once i open the jar and count the coins i won't have anything to look forward to. my raison de etre will have vanished.
i'm thoroughly enjoying the tomatoes and without further ado, i present little leo, the lemon tomato:
it doesn't really taste much different than a red tomato but who gives a shit, i can walk around saying, look at my beautiful lemon tomato. i gave the best one to my father and he didn't really seem to give a shit about it. i guess not giving a shit is hereditary but i'm not complaining. not giving a shit usually works out very well. the trick is making people think you really do give a shit. this is essential at the cracker factory.
in other news, mr google, sergey brin, has ditched his wife for a YOUNGER WOMAN. i find this very disturbing. all week i've heard about cars that will be able to drive themselves by 2020 and i'm pretty sure that google maps and satellite services will be front and center. the man responsible our safety should at least be able to resist the charms of a younger woman. i've thought google was a great company for years and if the world goes to self driving cars using google technology, there should be more than a few kopeks profit.
there is one thing i give a shit about:
i love you sons of bitches.
29 comments:
Did you know that Harry wants to fuck Leslie?
Hell, he'll fuck her brown hole, he isn't picky.
Long live Harry...
Who am I to judge, at least someone wants to fuck her.
This place has become quite the sewing circle...
I'm just an old sew and sew.
was that harry giving it to sarah palin?
Well thanks for the scandal, Amanda Rosenberg, or I'd never have known about THESE.
Also? He's 40 and she's 27. No biggie. Folks break up. His wife looks like a stiff anyway.
Are you familiar with this Canadian poison?
I got sucked in by the adorable hell demon on the label.
Gah! Cinnamon whiskey? You shouldn't have.
I was innocently trying to watch a Saints game and the bartender kept lining up free shots. I am polite.
At least it wasn't blueberry cinnamon...
I think mixing slices of your yellow tomato with slices of red tomato would look pretty good. Self-drive cars should be made compulsory for men whose testosterone levels exceed a safe limit. The Google guy's must have sky-rocketed when his new girlfriend moved in.
One of the best parts of Deadwood was Leslie having to suck Al’s cock. Life is uncertain, never turn down a blow job. I’m letting the neighbor have the rest of my tomatoes. I’ll be away this weekend, the rest of you monkeys are in charge while I’m gone. *poof*
Fuck Sarah Palin?
I wouldn't fuck Sarah Palin with Bea Arthurs dick.
I think opening the jar will be the breaking of one of the seals from Revelations, I can't wait.
The tomato looks good, mine are all gone, but there are lots of blooms, so maybe they're not quite done.
I think Mr. Google like women with a lot of forehead.
leslie - he's 50% older than that little harpy!
gb - i would have expected sergey to have an orgasmatron! i hope he's at least working on one.
king - i don't remember leslie blowing al.
giving away your tomatoes? you're a saint.
harry - we know it was you in that picture.
tex - i suspect the minute i open the jar obama will send a fleet of drones the like of which has never been seen to obliterate israel.
unless of course some community minded hebrew offers me half of palestine to keep the jar sealed.
Bill, your infatuation with Leslie's becoming one that's showing severe signs of being unhealthy and somewhat dangerous, mate. Perhaps you should try and keep these lustful thoughts to yourself, and maybe post them on a less popular blog, or even, why not consider creating an anonymous blog and letting all that pent-up frustration out, there, mate. ;-P
Take Care & Stay Lucky!
Love Ya Loads, Big Fella! Big Man-Hugs & Reciprocal Blow Jobs, etc.. ;-)
Steve...
Billy, mate, I find it rather sad that your current reason for existence lies within the jar of toonies and the number of trips that you've made on the Iron Maiden to the supermarket, my friend. However, mate, I'm sure, and most certainly do hope that, after the excitement of this nail-biting event is concluded, you'll be able to move on in life and find something equally, if not more, fascinating to keep you preoccupied with.
I was elated to read that your dad's still going strong, my friend - he must be a good and ripe old age these days. Please wish him well and pass on my best regards.
With regards to Mr Google, well, after having just taken a peak at his new poke, she's a bit of a stunner, to say the least. Ah, well, I guess that variety must be the spice of life. Love is love, and if it's true, then good on the bloke. I guess that only time will prove that shagging the arse of a tasty 27-year-old younger trade-in will prove this point.
Anyway, moving back to you last wonderfully thought-provoking blog, Inequality, because I can't be arsed and haven't the energy to go into extreme and elaborate detail at the minute, I'll just briefly say this: Yeah, I too often hate being a 'white man'. I think that perhaps on a global basis we're still suffering from the effects of Martin Luther King JR's "I Have A Dream" speech, because the fact of the matter is that, sadly, I believe that it will, and always has been the case that, within humanity, white supremacy will always dictate the status of a man or woman, and that their genuine right to be judged as equal to any other human being will always be reflected by the colour of their skin. And this fuckin' well has, and always will, leave a rancid putrid stench in my throat, and it sickens me to the core. Yet, there'll be people reading this who're still so fuckin' well sick and pitiful, that they'll still believe in white supremacy, and will still be 'champing at the bit' in conducting themselves in such a hideous and disgusting way. To those people, I unashamedly say: " Fuck You!"
And, with regards to those delightful Cronut burgers, I'd say, nah, mate, I'll pass, thank you, please give them to all the sick 'n twisted racial bigots who're out there, and who, are perhaps are even reading this.
To You & Yours, I Wish You a Pleasant Evening.
Take Care & Stay Lucky!
Peace,
Steve/Utopia...
farmer - saddened by my raison d'etre and the shallowness of my existence?
grasshopper, someday you might well graduate from a rudimentary one-dimensional thought process and learn to read between the lines.
until then, stay lucky. you'll need it.
Sawyer point 2 and a five gallon bucket for the rainwater. If the water is to come from the surface, likely polluted with pesticides, herbicides, and what not, get several quart containers of activated carbon from your local pet depot. If radiological concerns are likely, then let the water sit at least a day before filtration, ideally agitated with a zeolite material such as what they use to deoderize horse stalls and whatnot. Sweet PDZ.
Don't panic.
Sawyer point zero two... and get some sand to hold down the charcoal and provide further filtration. Some coffee filters to keep the sand and charcoal from clogging the sawyer would be wise, or you'll be back flushing twice a week.
Oh dear.
Pearls before swine farmers.
WTF is it with you and these horse operas pilgrim?
Fixed
You, Bilious, are not impossible to ignore.
thims - i have a cool article on the enviroment but i'm awaiting an opinion from my favorite geo engineer. i'll probably open the jar before he gets around to reviewing it.
harry - horse opera? it's shakespeare of the west!
aquarian - both the king and the farmer have missed you terribly.
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