TEN THINGS CANADA DOES BETTER THAN ANYWHERE ELSE!
number 1 on the list is apologize. in case anyone hasn't been paying attention, i've been trying to teach the king to apologize for years.
number 4 is AIR! we have good clean air but if you listen to those fucknut anti oil sands people, you'd think the oil sands have turned alberta into a wasteland. fuck al gore, and to think i used to like that pompous, arrogant prick who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.
number 8 is branding. the reason canadians sew maple leafs onto their backpacks when travelling is to let people know that we're not americans. most civilized countries like canadians more than americans but we look the same, talk almost the same and usually dress the same so some genius came up with the idea of plastering that maple leaf on everything. and of course most teenagers have canadian flags with a marijuana leaf replacing the maple leaf. i've still got several.
one thing we don't do very well is deliver the fucking mail. HOME DELIVERY BEING PHASED OUT, RATES INCREASING OVER 50% AND 8000 LAYOFFS. it would seem that our mail service is on a par with that sign language guy at mandela's funeral. i've been waiting for canada post to deliver the toy i bought on black friday for 2 weeks. the postal code was printed incorrectly on the label and i noticed it right away calling canada post with the tracking number but i was told they had to try and deliver it to the wrong area before they could fix the postal code. but since mail services all around the world are staffed by government workers i'm sure other countries have the same problem. so it goes.
on a more pleasant note, i was watching wrestlemania 3 last night. it was excellent, i was laughing like crazy at all the shenanigans. at one point there was a midget rasslin named little beaver and coincidentally, bob eucker had a girlfriend named little beaver. do i need to tell you what high level discussion ensued about bob and his little beaver? rasslin was excellent in the slapstick era.
i love you sons of bitches.
23 comments:
number 1 on the list is apologize. in case anyone hasn't been paying attention, i've been trying to teach the king to apologize for years.
Fuck you, in case you haven't noticed I don't even apologize to get more pussy and I damn sure don't want to fuck you.
I am da king.....
You failed to mention one great thing you have over there, you are swamped with hookers and drunk women that want to fuck.
Actually, that is pretty damn liberal.
yes, you are the king and that means you can't be made to apologize but perhaps you're looking at this the wrong way.
we canadians don't apologize to say we're sorry, we apologize as an opening gambit in many sorts of disputes or competitions. it's all about misdirection and nothing makes a person lower his guard like a good old seemingly sincere apology.
grasshopper, when you can snatch the pebble from my hand, i will teach you the weirding way of the fabled canadian apology.
I can believe you've got great air in Canada. That's what happens when you have a lot of space with not too many people. But why would Al Gore be telling Canadians what to do? He doesn't even have the authority to tell Americans what to do.
I am sorry you are such a dork.
Actually, I have no idea what you are talking about but IS THIS HOW THEY DO IT?
NO APOLOGIES..
FREE THE NIPPLE...
gb - al likes to tell people to reduce their carbon foot print even though he has one of the biggest foot prints on the planet.
thims - being a dork can be very beneficial at times.
king - you're the exception to the rule that proves my apology hypothesis.
Gore is just another fucking spoiled rich fuck.
Being a dork sure played off for All Gore...
Stoopid droid.
I think that was probably your fault, Thimscool. Were you spelling "paid" as "payed" when your phone auto-corrected?
Fess up.
Voice recognition failure...
Well in that case, I am sorry you are such a dork.
What goes around comes around.
Speaking of crabs, where the hell is ALTF?
Cuba. And I bet she took The Tater with her.
Then I'll have a couple of shots of this to celebrate the counterrevolution.
Oof. Is nothing sacred?
Perhaps Gil Scott-Heron would be amused.
SHIT HAPPENS...
my new big ips monitor arrived and i can't believe how handsome the king is.
I can't either.
Hehehehehe..
I bought some crepe paper in the Dollar Tree, two rolls for a buck. It was actually made in the U.S.
Not worth a shit for making fuses though, falls apart in a wet solution as bad as ass wipe.
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