whilst eating old halloween ju jubes i noticed a very jagged edge to one of my molars. after a little investigation i discovered part of the tooth was missing. time to panic. i spit out the big black witches head and noticed a white chunk embedded in it. sure enough, it was a chunk of my tooth. just what i needed, a fucked up tooth.
this wasn't the first time i've been the victim of hard stale ju jubes. several years back i was eating stale santa ju jubes at the movie theatre and lost a chunk of a molar. my bargain ju jubes ended up causing me to get a gold crown. so when i lost the chunk of tooth to the witches head i had dreams of another crown. the dentist fit me yesterday afternoon. after ninety minutes of pain in the chair all was repaired. i didn't need a crown but it took a long time and the bill came to $571. So me buying cheap old halloween ju jubes cost the insurance company $571, so it goes.
i've now decided to give up ju jubes. if i can give up alcohol and quit watching pro rasslin then giving up ju jubes should be a piece of cake but i've got about 5 pounds of the offending halloween ju jubes left. it's fun wathing ruby chew ju jubes but the smart thing would be to toss them in the trash.
i love you sons of bitches.
20 comments:
The name of that sweet is very similar to "juju", which means black magic in Africa. I wish I'd told you before you ate it.
gb - that black witches head turned out to be magic for the dentist!
I had no frigging idea what ju jubes were before looking at this post so now I'm a little better educated.
I'm certain that said education will be helpful to me in the future, if I don't forget what in the hell ju jubes are.
Hey, ya better have Rubies teeth checked also.
I don't know what you're talking about but if something ruins your teeth, then toss it. Or even better give it to someone you don't like. SMILE
I will not eat those things or dum dum's either..they kill your teeth.
that will teach you to mess with witches..
I loved that movie..but that dentist scene freaks me out.
I know it's not easy throwing out something you really like, but I had to throw away my Australian black licorice. Had I kept eating it I could have killed myself. See my current post about it.
bbc - ruby's waiting to check her teeth on the mailman.
charlene - you should run to the store and buy some red santa claus ju jubes asap. there excellent!
yellowdog - so far i've made it 3 days without a ju jube. the big test will be the day after xmas when they go on sale.
cheyene - i bought a big bag of australian black licorice last year and it took me about 6 months to eat it all.
I don't think Ju Jubes are the problem here. The key word I kept noticing was "STALE".
Take advice from the Subway Sandwich commercials...."EAT FRESH !"
You probably don't think so since it happened to you but that was a funny story. Glad you got all fixed up and maybe you give the rest of the ju jubes to some of the lovely police officers around town that are not so nice.
I think I'll just stick with Reeses Peanut Butter Cups. Not that I have to give a shit about teeth I don't have, and don't miss.
Step away from the ju ju bes.
heff - maybe i'll stick them in the microwave next time to soften them up.
mr shife - it is a little funny when i look back but i was totally pissed when it happened.
crazy - i've stepped away for 4 days. the question is can i keep away.
Wow, I was just talking/writing about this movie.
I think he gave up dentistry and now works for the TSA.
Yikes! Sorry about the dental troubles. You know, I don't think I've ever been to the movies and gotten a box of ju jubes that weren't stale.
I had the same thing happen when I was eating a mento. While I was driving to the beach so I had to live with the broken tooth for a week. Fortunately, the dentist was able to rebuild the broken edge of the molar with that white amalgam, so you can't even tell.
My grandma didn't have any teeth but loved peanut brittle. She couldn't eat it with her dentures, though, because they might break or get stuck.
Her solution: She would soak the brittle in a damp wash cloth and crush the peanuts with a hammer. Gramma was smart.
tex - i'd rather get patted down than have the shit drilled out of teeth. hell, i rather have a prostate exam than have the shit drilled out of my teeth.
ananda - i buy my stale ju jubes after holidays for 75% off. i might save a few kopeks on the candy but it costs the dental plan a fortune.
secret - they rebuilt mine too.
robert - god love grandma, warming up ju jubes works too but i'm usually in too much of rush to get the candy in my mouth.
$571? $571?
A plain, unseasoned almond cracked a tooth and cost me $2,000!
Meh!
shaw - wow! i'm glad i bought ju jubes rather than almonds.
black licorice is bad for you in large amounts..makes your blood pressure rise and gives you bad headaches.
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