neither rain nor snow nor skanks could stop the pilgrim from making a house call, and a long fucking house call at that. a not so lovely trip on the b.c. ferry system to vancouver island. i'm sad to say that the house trip was highly unsuccessful from a humanitarian point of view but highly successful from a new, used tire perspective. my new, used tires performed like real troopers. no problems in the light snow and generally shitty road conditions. of my friend i can only say this, he basically told me fuck off and i couldn't think of any reason to disagree with him. i now know how mrs frump feels.
of greater concern to me at the moment is that little son of a bitch donald.
i was bitterly disappointed in donald for not producing any flowers in the summer and it now appears certain that he's not a canadian arctic orchid that waits for the first frost and then produces the most beautiful flower in the world. i still haven't conceded that donald is a weed and my summer project was pure folly. i'm thinking of running out and buying a poinseitta to plant where donald has made his home for the past year. then i could run into the house and announce that donald has come through and saved xmas. years ago when the kids were little and i enjoyed the odd drink, this might have happened but now it seems highly unlikely. more likely is me picking up a similar looking plant in the spring and replacing donald with a more co-operative specimen.
so take a deep breath and enjoy the moment. remember, it can take a long time to become what you already are.
i love you sons of bitches.
58 comments:
Well, you gave it a proper try then. Good on ya. And good on ya tires.
Skanks?
there was a young skank making eyes at me on the ferry. luckily the king has taught me not to trust skanks.
I only have eyes for you Mr Pilgrim and would have been honored to have blown you on the big boat. Maybe next time.
Oh, Oh, Ohoooo, Carmelita; don't you see how that PIG pilgrim ignores you and your stainless honor? .. to say nothing of your need to honor one in your mouth until the swelling goes down or the cows come home ?
If I know that pig of a pilgrim he was at least trying to give Mrs frump a right jolly rodgering in the guise of "free therapy".
You could have made it a trifecta pilgrim and met the kingster too, then he would have buzzed yall by my prison cell for a fish sandwhich or your favorite poison.
Maybe on the next round eh?
ps direct those skanky young thangs to Hugh's joint, haha
Mr. Pilgrim is an island of goodness and wholesomeness in a sea of sewage and broken promises and I would like to fuck a saint before I die.
You Harry, can go fuck yourself.
He told you to fuck off after you went all the way to his house? I hope he offered you a cup of tea first. Donald doesn't look like a weed, but you might as well feed him to the rabbits.
thanks carmelita, you've made one old man happy and another old man green with envy.
don't worry harry, green suits you.
It's cold here now. Your droopy plant looks better then any mine. Anyhow everything is sort of covered with snow.
Coffee is on
gb - yes, i wore out my welcome rather quickly. i'm thinking of driving to saskatchewan this spring and loading the mighty hyundai up with potash. the king's nitrogen suggestion didn't pan out.
dora - i can't figure donald out. i planted him in late summer 2012 and figured he'd do something this past summer but nothing! if he was a weed, he would have flowered.
maybe i have a triffid on my hands.
It's hard for us saints to get fucked, women really want men with dead dicks and fat wallets.
Maybe donald didn't have to flower, maybe donald was supposed to be a fucking salad.
Carmelita is no mere woman, she is a Goddesssss among saints. Saints that fuck that is.
Carmellllla....mmmm, sooooo sweeet. Keep typing,I'm almost there...
A found these comments most fascinating. R wants to know if Carmelita would blow Saint Nick...
I just made something that will blow anything, cheap. :-)
Errr, Billy, I guess that I simply and merely, errr, agree with everyone elses comments, mate. Makes things a lot simpler, dunitt?! :-P
To You & Yours, I Wish You a Happy & Peaceful Day!
Take Care & Stay Lucky!
Peace,
Steve...
tell that fucking saint nick to go to the back of the line behind me and the king.
I could care less about a blowjob, just want some good screwing.
Poor old Donald, no one every really new what he was or why, for that matter.
Good song choice, I turned it up for everyone to hear.
Turns out, some of the people on the block didn't want to hear it, a bunch of Grinches if you ask me.
Donald now looks like the rest of you.
Deadbeets.
Ha
Ha
Ha
dead beets - very clever. i'll have to check donalds roots.
tex - yes, charles brown is the king of xmas music.
SLIDE SHOW...
Glad the tires held up well but sorry to hear about the plant. Also sorry to hear about the less-than-pleasant welcome you received after your trip. I guarantee you nothing but warm and fuzzies if you ever visit me and the Tankster. Take care BP.
Looks more like rhubarb to me but what do I know? It wasn't the greatest year for planting here in the NW anyway.
As to the sexual tone here, perhaps cucumbers or zucchini might be a bit more utilitarian.
Pit bull attacks Pomeranian!
king - i don't like turtles hanging from trees.
mr shife - i'd love to play with all the cool stuff you've bought kyle and hayden.
demuer - rhubbard? maybe.
thims - that might be the crappiest video i've ever seen. (well, 30 seconds of it.)
I can do worse!
I don't like cold hands.
Is the massage parlor heater broken?
The bar heater is broken so I didn't go there for a week in protest.
If you are not making enough money to get the fucking heater fixed or replaced maybe you should close the fucking bar and go get a job.
Really, I don't care if you have big tits, when I come into your bar I want a warn place to drink.
Why don't you fix it for them?
Why should I?
If she isn't making enough money to keep the bar in good repair she should sell it to someone that will run it better.
I've saved her hundreds of dollars over the years and she thinks giving me two free beers is payment enough.
Then she goes and blows money at the casino, fuck her.
That's the spirit, buddy.
You're right, though. When you only do favors to get something in return, it's time to stop doing favors.
Fuck you, bitch. I'll help others that don't make me feel like they are always just using me.
Good plan.
Shuddup and suck my cock.
What's in it for me?
I'll finger fuck while you do it.
No. You're just using me.
At least you would feel fucked.
Then we'd finally have something in common.
We've always had something in common, an obsession with my cock.
king - excellent points on the casino and not being used.
Billy, did you inhale - just like Clinton and Obama?
Peace,
Steve...
I inhaled, but pot has never been that interesting to me so I've never gotten into it much. I've heard it is great during sex but I wouldn't know about that, maybe Leslie would like to smoke a fat joint and suck my cock to get her rocks off.
Oh hell, never mind....
You poor thing. Can you no longer afford hookers?
Don't currently know any.
This should cheer up your friend!
That idiot in the video needs a cool hat, and some pussy...
Don't we all?
I dont, I'm over it.
Well, maybe a hat, a man can never have too many hats.
That idiot in the video IS a pussy and needs to stop.
what a bargain, only 30 bucks to sponsor one of buckwheat's videos.
those fat soft hands make me think he's never done a real day's work in his life.
Those fat soft hands make me think he's a great jerkoff.
Pilgrim, what's your take on bit coin, litecoin, and quark coin?
i'd rather have gold or silver coins.
Me too, or more gun powder, I know gals that like to blow shit up and shoot guns.
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